The continuing adventures of Temmer Wadsworth Longfellow, Master Bard

1 Torodio - Istur

Ever since The Great Storm hit, I hear people saying it's hell around here. I've spent a lot of time in Ravenloft, and I can tell you – this isn't hell. It's just a fucking lot of snow.
But Hell is on its way. First the prophecy. Then werewolves in Istur. It all points to one thing – Ravenloft is invading Hurva. Somehow I always knew it would happen sooner or later.
I was really hoping for later.

It's been a busy life for me in Istur the past few months. At least there's no piracy with all the seas frozen. I don't even know where Red is. Not that I'm worried – she can take care of herself. When I was a kid I always thought pirates were cool. The truth is that piracy is a lot of god damn work, the pirates stink and they can't carry a tune in a bucket. I wouldn't bother with it if it weren't for Red – I just can't say no to that woman.
I used to spend my nights womanizing, but I don't have as much time for that any more. Too many damn werewolves in town. I don't mean to criticize your priestess, but next time you send Nikita on a mission, please ask her not to bring back any souvenirs from Ravenloft. I'm sure they were all very attached to Guildenstern, but ever since he got loose he's bitten so many people I've got an epidemic on my hands. I've killed twelve in the past few months, but there's plenty more out there. My sword bleeds every full moon.
My days have been spent working with the choir. I know a lot of people were surprised when Dougal Wentworth hired me to be his Choir Master at the Word of Law. Nobody thought I would associate with the Esterealeans, or that Dougal would hire a part-time pirate. No, it's not the money. (Actually, I'm taking my fee in holy water.) The fact is, I want to be close to the Church. Mark my words, when Ravenloft invades, it will be the priests that save us. I plan to be right there with them. And the piracy thing is just a hobby.

To be honest, even the werewolf hunting has taken a back seat while I was getting the choir ready for the ceremony. It's been a lot of work, but I wanted to put on a spectacular performance. Rhavin saved my life from a vampire once – I owed him that much. Especially for such a special occasion.
Good thing I started recruiting my choir and musicians as soon as Dougal hired me. It wasn't easy persuading Isturians to come sing at the new Esterealean temple. No, I didn't charm any of them (I promised Dougal I wouldn't.) The good parents of Istur were eager to send their kids once they found out that all the other parents were sending theirs. Most of the adults I lured with food. Alanna was happy to cater choir practices for a reasonable fee. Musicians are notoriously unreliable, but with all the famine in the land, nobody was going to turn down free meals. I just hope Dougal never asks where the money came from. I can't very well tell him it's from looting the homes of dead werewolves.

I got back to the Oasis the other night late, after a fruitless night chasing werewolves, to find a note under my door. It was from Alanna, and it read, "The Party of Prophecy Has Returned." Gods, I hate it when she teases me about the prophecy. It's not funny, damn it. I was up for hours, thinking about the prophecy, the impending invasion, and the hell that was going to break loose in Istur.

I tried to find Rhavin the next morning, but he wasn't at The Word of Law. I spent the day working on the music for the ceremony, and I ran into Galen afterwards. He'd just finished talking to a bunch of beggars who'd showed up at the shrine claiming to be newly called paladins. Riiiight. I guess it's more original than the lame blind man routine.
Now, this may surprise you, but Galen and I have become good friends in the past months. I trust him with everything except the illegal stuff I do, and he's heard about most of my Ravenloft experiences. (Except the time I worked for you-know-who. I don't like to talk about that.) Galen's a really nice guy, and I like him. He's a little too damn polite sometimes, but nobody's perfect.
I took Galen aside and explained my concerns. "So Galen, we need to make sure Dougal is protected at all times. What with the impending Ravenloft invasion, they're bound to try to assassinate him."
Galen looked dutifully concerned. "Do you have proof?"
I sighed. If it weren't for the Esterealeans' insistence on proof for everything, I'd have had help hunting the werewolves a long time ago.
"Well, no," I admitted. "It's just logical."
"And who are they?" Galen persisted.
"The Ravenloft people. You know. Them."
Galen looked puzzled. He really is smart, but sometimes I have trouble getting through to him. I think he spent too much time in the country.
"Are they… a group of adventurers?"
I patiently explained to Galen that Ravenloft was invading, and their scouts would try to assassinate Dougal. Come on, wasn't it obvious? It was getting foggy, for gods' sake.
"Dougal might be one of the first people that someone evil might want to assassinate," Galen said. I was finally getting through to him.
"That's right. We need to keep an eye on him."
Galen said we should inform Dougal, but we needed to find "proof" first. So much for getting through to him. He's not going to get it until we're hip deep in vampires.
I needed to get the hell away from this conversation, so I told Galen I'd go find proof. I really meant to go find Dara at the Port o' Call and forget about this nightmare for a few hours, but Galen offered to come along and help look for clues.
Great. Galen might be a little naïve, but even he wasn't going to believe I was looking for "proof" in a strip club. "Okay, let's go hit some taverns," I said. "We can eavesdrop on their conversations."
Galen frowned. "Do you really think They would be in taverns?" He pronounced ‘they’ with a capital ‘T’. You could hear it.
"Well, it's cold out. They have to be somewhere. In a tavern, they can blend in with the local populace."
"I can blend," Galen insisted.
I looked at the squeaky, clean paladin in his bright, shiny armor. "Man, the only place you can blend is the armory."
Galen looked a little hurt, so I decided to help him out and smear some dirt on his impossibly shiny armor. Unfortunately, those damn paladin powers cleaned it right off. Well, there was no way to ditch Galen now without hurting his feelings, so I let him tag along.
As soon as we got outside, I noticed it had gotten foggy. Really foggy. No way I was staying out in this. I ran all the way to The Oasis. Galen, who has finally given up trying to tell me that fog isn't dangerous, kept up easily. He wasn't even out of breath when we got there. Damn him.
The usual crowd was at the Oasis. The six-fingered mage was studying spells with Alanna. Rhavin was standing near the chalk line Alanna had drawn to keep Canliss from getting close to the door. (That damn ring is so annoying. I don't know why Canliss won't let me just cut off his finger. He's got extra.)
Alanna looked up from her books and smiled. "Hey Temmer. Galen."
I nodded. "Hey, Rhavin," I said when I'd caught my breath.
"Temmer, um….. hello." Rhavin and I had a little disagreement the last time we met, but he's gotten over it.
"Good to see you, too," I said.
"I hear you're, uh, the Choir Master?" Rhavin asked doubtfully.
"Yep," I said, grinning. Rhavin probably thought I was up to some mischief. I'm not, but it was fun to let him think so.
"He's actually quite good," Galen defended me. He's so damn loyal, you just can't help liking the guy.
"I've never had a voice for singing," Rhavin said.
I pointed at Galen, whom Dougal had already assigned a role in the ceremony. "This one does, but Dougal got to him first, damn it."
Galen frowned at me. "Temmer, watch your language," he whispered.
Alanna and Canliss laughed. Galen's persistent attempts to reform me have become a regular source of amusement at The Oasis.
"I only promised to watch my language when I'm in church," I insisted. "So Rhavin, I need to find out what you know." I pointed to the fog outside the windows. "When's the Ravenloft invasion?"
Rhavin's eyes widened at the mention of Ravenloft. "What?"
"Well, think about it. Armies of undead. Fog rolling in. Ravenloft is invading. It's a natural conclusion."
Alanna sighed. "Temmer, how many times have I told you. Istur is a port city. The fog rolls in all the time…"
"Yeah, but there aren't armies of undead in the country-side all the time now, are there?"
Alanna just shook her head. Canliss seemed amused. You'd think a Ravenloft veteran would show more sense.
"So, you didn't bring back any souvenirs this time, did you?" I asked Rhavin. "Last time you guys came home you dragged in a werewolf."
Hasaan came bustling out of the kitchen and smiled when he saw me. "Oh, Temmer ,there you are," he said in his funny, rolling accent. "I put on a fresh pot of spiced prunes. Be right back."
Hasaan bustled back into the kitchen. "Good man," I called after him. I don't know why nobody else likes his hot spiced prunes. They're awesome.
"We didn't bring any people back this time," Rhavin promised me.
"Are you sure?" Alanna teased.
Galen leaned towards Rhavin as much as a man in armor is capable of leaning.
"Master Longfellow believes," he said, (I wish he'd stop calling me that.) "That the Ravenloft people are going to kill Father Wentworth. He would be the target if evil people were in town and planning to assassinate someone."
"Rhavin," Alanna called over Canliss' laughter, "Pay no attention to Temmer. He's in here every two weeks explaining some new conspiracy theory."
I scowled at Alanna. Just because none of the conspiracies had happened yet didn't mean they weren't in the works.
"It's an interesting idea, Temmer," Rhavin said. I could tell he was just humoring me. "But I doubt that they would start with Father Wentworth. Granted, I get a little nervous when I see fog roll in, also."
Galen looked surprised at Rhavin's admission. "But Brother Rhavin, it's just precipitation."
I sighed. "Oh come on, Galen. I've told you about the Magic Mist."
Alanna brought me an ale. She looked amused, but I thanked her for the drink. Explaining Ravenloft to Galen is always thirsty work.
"Master Longfellow," Galen said, "spins good tales."
"He's an excellent story teller," Rhavin admitted.
I sighed. They weren't just stories. Rhavin should know better.
"So which Dark Lord is in charge of the invasion?" I asked him.
"That would have been Whats-his-face," Canliss called out.
Rhavin looked puzzled. "Well, we did defeat two…"
Alanna took out The Big Black Book. I shuddered. "So which prophecy did you see happen?" she asked Rhavin.
"Um, the one about the lifeless child, um…" Rhavin stumbled over the words, but I knew them all too well.
"The Lifeless Child of Stern mother found, Heralds a Time, a Night of Evil Unbound," I said, shuddering.
Rhavin blinked at me in surprise. "Yeah, that's it."
I shuddered. "So how was The Night of Evil Unbound?"
Rhavin told the story of this horrible adventure on a haunted boat. It ended with them finding the lifeless child and being zapped back home.
"Oh, great," I said. "The Night of Evil Unbound is gonna be here in Istur. I just knew it. I told you Galen – they're invading any minute. Alanna has your proof."
We sat down to review that accursed Prophecy and compare notes. Then Rhavin brought out this enormous stack of papers with writing all over them.
"Jvelto's balls, what is all that ?" I asked, ignoring Galen's frown of disapproval.
"It's a copy of Nikita's notes," Rhavin explained. He handed them to Alanna. I had to wonder where Nikita got the time to write what amounted to an epic novel while battling undead. Didn't the woman ever sleep?
We compared notes on Ravenloft for awhile. Then Alanna brought me another drink, so I decided to give up for the night and sing some good tavern songs until it was time to go to bed.

3 Torodio - Istur

Well, the ceremony was a great success, thank the gods. I was a little worried about the invitation part. When Galen told me a bunch of incense-wielding acolytes were taking the written invitation to Rhavin at The Oasis for the "Invitation Ceremony". I could well imagine Alanna's outrage at them stinking up her tavern. Not everybody likes incense.

The morning of the ceremony, I got up well before dawn, dressed in my new white and gold silks with the purple cape and headed out to the Word of Law to make last minute preparations. There was a time I was never out of bed before noon, but since I started hanging out with the Esterealeans I've gotten used to seeing the sun rise. I have to admit I was excited. This would be my choir's first major performance at the temple, and I'd done everything in my power to make sure it would not be soon forgotten.
The temple looked great, except for those damn snow sculptures outside the Soltanites had insisted on building. The sanctuary was so packed, with every cleric and notable in Istur having turned out for the service. Rhavin's friends and the head clergy sat in the front pews. My kids started singing the Allegri, and they were perfect. I was so proud of them.
The look on Rhavin's face when they processed him into the shrine was priceless. He kept looking around, as if wondering why all these people were here. It took him a while to realize that all of these people had turned out for him. Rhavin's smile kept getting bigger as he took it all in, and I couldn't resist grinning back at him when he glanced over at the choir.
The service was lengthy, with even more than the usual run of Esterealean prayers, blessings, invocations and sermons. People woke up for all the choral pieces, though. Everyone gave a great performance, and my fears that Marius would wander off and have a drink in the middle of the ceremony proved unfounded. I guess all those threats got through to him.

Half way through the ceremony, we processed Rhavin over to Garth's stables to pick up the horse. Rhavin looked like a kid at Festival when he got sight of his divine mount. She was gorgeous – a big, white mare with gold at the edge of her main and tail.
Rhavin could barely contain his impatience to ride his new horse, but there were two hours of ceremony at the stables first. Dougal blessed every freaking thing that touched that horse. Rhavin got to put them on and brush her, but he looked crestfallen as Dougal grabbed the mare's reins and we processed back to the shrine. (On the way we picked up the Jveltoans, who'd ducked out of the stable part of the ceremony to have a few drinks.)
When we got back into the ceremony, I sang the Atria, and Dougal said a prayer. Then Rhavin finally got to take the reins of his horse. Dougal gave a long speech, and then asked Rhavin to pronounce the name of the mare.
Rhavin's smile grew even wider. "This horse shall be named, 'Dancer'."
Rhavin still didn't get the ride the horse. Galen stepped up next, and chanted all kinds of paladin stuff making Rhavin promise to look after the horse. Galen has a great voice, and he did a good job. Too bad he couldn't be in the choir. We could use another good bass.
When Galen was finished, we sang the Gloria and the Agnus Dei. Then, it was finally the moment Rhavin had been waiting for. Dougal stepped up to invite everyone to a post ceremony reception that Alanna was hosting at The Oasis, then he nodded to Rhavin. With a big grin, the happy paladin leaped into the mare's saddle. She pranced out of the shrine with the musicians and acolytes following. Rhavin stopped briefly at the door to help little Colin into the saddle in front of him.
I congratulated my choir as we disrobed, then I took the kids aside and told them their parents had given me permission to take them all to the party. They were thrilled about that. I'd been telling them lots of stories about Rhavin's heroics.
Alanna had put out quite a spread, but the kids all ran up to Rhavin. "Tell us about the blood-sucking demon," Tobin pleaded.
"Demon?" asked a confused Rhavin.
"Vampire," I whispered to him by way of explanation. When I told the kids how Rhavin had saved me from the vampire, "demon" was the best Hurvan equivalent I could come up with.
I grinned at Rhavin's expression and shook his hand. "Congratulations. She's a fine horse."
Tobin tucked at Rhavin's tunic to get his attention. "Temmer told us about the blood sucking demon that you fought off."
Rhavin smiled. "I'm sure Master Temmer told that story much better than I could." Paladins. They're so damn modest.
"Nope," said Tobin. "He said you were the only one who could tell it."
Chuckling at Rhavin's scowl, I ducked inside to get a drink. I said hello to some folks then tore the kids away from Rhavin to get some food in them. I probably shouldn't have let them have so much sugar. But they had a great time playing "blood sucking demon," holding their fingers in front of their mouth for fangs and chasing each other with imaginary stakes. When Avery ran straight into Dougal, I figured it was time to take the kids home. They got over their disappointment quickly when Ester offered to help escort them home. They all love Ester.
Ester and I passed Rhavin taking Nikita for a ride on the way back. They looked pretty damn happy.

It was a good day. The choir was coming together, we had a reason to celebrate. Except for the snow, the armies of undead and the damn werewolves, everything was going well.
I should have known it couldn't last. The next morning I show up at the shrine, and Dougal tells me how Rhavin, Galen, an Azkalite named Reverend Lt. Frieda Cortez, Captain Kariya Frazier, and a Suressian Ranger named Loran were taking vital information to the Archbishop in Geston.
"I'd like you to go with them," Dougal said.
Sure as hell I didn't want to. It's at least three months to Geston. I was worried about the choir and the werewolves. But how could I say no? Dougal had handed me my dream job, and I know damn well there's not another Esterealean in Hurva who'd let a part-time pirate direct his choir. He'd earned my loyalty and my friendship, and those are things I don't take lightly.
"I'll go," I said. "But Father, are you sure both Galen and Rhavin should go? Who's going to defend the shrine if the undead attack? Or the werewolves?"
"Rhavin must report to Lord Holdifax's keep for an important ceremony."
"Another one?" I blurted.
Dougal scowled at me.
"Sorry. Go on."
"Galen must be certified to train our newly arrived paladins."
"Paladins?" I recalled the crowd of ragged people Dougal and Galen had been talking to yesterday. "Really? You mean they weren't beggars?"
Dougal gave me his stern look.
"Um, no offense, Father. When are we leaving?"
Dougal said we needed to leave as soon as possible, so I bid him farewell and headed off to The Oasis to get ready. After telling Alanna about the trip and making sure she knows where all my caches of weapons and holy water are, I started packing. I wasn't thrilled about marching across the country through armies of rampaging undead, but at least I could get some choir business done in Geston. Dougal had told me about the conference every seven years to approve new music for the official Esterealean hymnody, and I could get the information I needed at The Cathedral of The One. That was worth dodging a few undead armies for.

The next day we all got together in The War Room at The Oasis for introductions and planning. Loran turned out to be a small, seedy looking guy in the usual Ranger's outfit – boring and unwashed. Reverend Lt. Frieda Cortez is a fairly tall woman with bright red hair tied back in braids. I was thrilled to see an Azkalite in the group, but Frieda seems a lot more serious than my friend Morallon. I'm hoping she'll loosen up once she gets to know us.
Everyone introduced themselves and explained why they were going on the mission. Kariya, who was just promoted to Captain, asked us all to use her given name. She's a lot more easy-going than rumors would lead one to believe. I begged everyone not to call me Master Longfellow. Frieda, who has more last names than a circus troupe, told us all to call her Reverend Cortez.
It took hours to discuss the route and the supplies we needed to take. I don't know why these things always take hours, but they do. I was disappointed when we decided against taking a wagon. I was going to have to travel all the way across Hurva with two paladins and no kegs of ale. I'd have to settle for a few bottles of whiskey. It's gonna be a long trip.
Loran didn't say much while we were discussing the packing. I don't trust him. I'll have to make sure to sharpen my sword around him first chance I get, to make sure he's not a werewolf. Drawing steel in the middle of the War Room while we were talking about pack mules might be a little too obvious.
Loran advised us to take the overland route instead of traveling by the southern route and sailing up the Wydendeep River. That suited me well, since I sink like a stone in water. He did warn us about the dangers of the Suresanti Forest. "Mind you," he added, "if I can rid the forest of evil, so much the better."
Rhavin and I exchanged an amused glance. Loran wanted to rid an entire forest of evil? It reminded us both of Thibor.
"Burn down the forest," said Frieda. "No forest, no evil."
Everyone laughed at that, except Loran and Frieda. The ranger wasn't amused, and the Azkalite wasn't joking.
As our planning session was finally winding down, there was a knock at the door. It turned out to be two messengers carrying what was obviously an enormous painting.
"Delivery for Rhav-ee-an Harkness," said the bigger one. They handed the unwieldy burden to Rhavin with a note and departed.
"What is it?" Kariya asked curiously.
Rhavin read the note. He looked a little uneasy. "Um, it's from Nikita."
The paladin seemed reluctant to open the gift, but he gave in to everyone's urging. He started to peel back the paper, then blushed the deepest shade of red I've ever seen on a human being. Loran, who'd been looking over Rhavin's shoulder, burst out laughing and almost fell off his chair.
Rhavin hastily replaced the wrapping. "I don't think this is for everyone to see."
It must have been one hell of a painting. I'll have to remember to show Rhavin the portrait of Red that hangs above my bed some day. It's fun watching him blush.
"Where are you gonna put it?" Kariya asked.
Loran laughed harder.
"Um, it's very personal," Rhavin said, blushing even harder. Loran did fall off his chair then.
"It's not that funny," Rhavin snapped. "Um, I think we're done here."
Loran recovered enough to get back in his chair. "So Rhavin," he said, "why on the gods' green earth are you leaving here?"
Rhavin frowned that disapproving frown that all the paladins do so well. "We have a very important mission," he said gravely.
Loran just shook his head in wonder. Assuming he's not a werewolf, I was beginning to think the Ranger might be a good traveling companion. I like his sense of humor.
We were finished with all the planning (finally), so we departed. I heard Rhavin promising to show Kariya the painting later as we left The War Room.

Well, we had two days to pack and say our goodbyes before leaving – it might seem like a lot of time, but there was a lot to be done. I was forced to put Marius in charge of the choir while I'm gone. I'm having nightmares about that decision already, but there simply aren't any other bards in town with enough talent to do the job. I just know Marius is going to forget t o show up for practice (or worse, services) and he's going to drive Dougal insane. Well, there was no other choice. I did ask Dougal to assign a couple people to look after my kids – I don't trust Marius to keep them safe while I'm gone.
Speaking of the kids, I went to each of their houses to say good bye and ask them to practice hard while I'm away. I'm really attached to the little guys. I promised to bring them all toys from Geston, and that I'd tell them lots of stories when I get back.
After that, and a few other details (like making Julian promise not to go out hunting werewolves on his own), I spent the rest of the time saying farewell to Dara, Lila, Concetta, Gina, Teresa, Regina, Corinne, Dielle and Ilka. I know they're all going to miss me terribly. I'm sure as hell going to miss them.
I made one last stop. I left donations at all the temples (except the Soltanites still won't let me in) and asked for a blessing for the trip. Two paladins, no ale, and armies of undead. I figure I'm going to need all the blessings I can get.